Handy Hints

In a weaker moment I somehow found myself being persuaded to help judge some short story contests this summer. The contests remits are very different but I have found the following issues so far to be pretty universal - here follows a public service broadcast on how not to win a short story contest or get yourself published.

1. Do not copy and paste a story from the internet complete with pictures and write your name in pen on the work.
2. Do not use a font so small that the reader needs a microscope.
3. Do not use anything other than Arial, TNR or Courier as your font.
4. Do not print your entry in bold.
5. Do not put a poem in the middle of it.
6. Do not write a covering letter explaining your story.
7. Do not write a cover letter that's longer than the short story giving me your autobiography.
8. Please give your story a title.
9. Stick to the word count.
10. Do not blame the computer for your spelling and grammar errors.
11. Do not print your entry on paper with a fancy background.
12. Do not put your story in a fancy binder.

Thank you

Conference report pt2

Where was I? Oh yes, After Saturdays lunch came more workshops. First a round up for the New Writers Scheme, where we all look at what works and what can be made better. Most of the published writers have experienced the scheme themselves when trying for publication and know how it feels to be anxiously waiting for that precious feedback. Then came Jessica Hart's workshop on character, plot and emotional tension. If you visit here regularly you'll know I am a huge fan of Jessica's, not only is she a great writer but she really knows her stuff when it comes to sharing her expertise with other writers so it was a really useful workshop. Then I have to admit I skived the last workshop in favour of a quick chat with Jessica before she dashed off and then I had a quick shower - taking care not to fall through the damaged floor of my bathroom - and a nice lie down before the Gala Dinner.
The Gala dinner is always a highlight with everyone dressing up and photographing one anothers shoes. We did take pictures of cleavages one year but I think we'd been in the bar for a long time then. The food at dinner was a bit of a disaster - we learned later that there had been an accident to one of the kitchen staff - but the only edible part of the meal was the soup and roll we had as a starter and the mint that came with the coffee. We did contemplate sending out for pizza on our table but decided it was too late at night. Luckily Sandra Forder came to our rescue once more as it was her birthday and there was cake in her kitchen.
I made it back to my room round about midnight by which time it was raining. Biddy and Anna arrived a few minutes later. I went out into the hall when I heard mild shrieks and giggles from the upstairs landing to find Biddy - dressed in a rather lovely black bra - perched on a chair and waving a pipe from a hoover at the open skylight while Anna hung onto her legs. They managed to close the skylight to stop the rain from pouring in and we finally went to bed after we'd had a conversation about the sex appeal - or not - of the Top Gear presenters.
Sunday saw some rather sore heads in the dining room for breakfast. Next workshop was Freda Lightfoot's 'Creating a Brand', another superb workshop. Then it was Linda Gilliard on exploring all the senses when writing. I'm in two minds about that workshop. The exercises were very good but there some statements made that as someone who has clients, colleagues and friends with vision and hearing issues, troubled me a little.
This was followed by the conference round-up and lunch before the lovely Judy Jarvie gave me a ride to the station where I spent a very happy half an hour comparing bookshelves with Allie Spencer where we discovered we both loved Chaucer and PG Wodehouse.
So there you have it, the insider goss on what we did last weekend. The wonderful Liz Fenwick is giving superbly detailed accounts of all the writers tips she gleaned on her blog - link is in the sidebar.
Now to save up ready for next year - and I think I may have volunteered to deliver a workshop.

Conference report pt1

Longtime regular readers will know that I'm not the world's best at writing these. Other bloggers do a far better job when it comes to detailing workshops and who had the best shoes, but here goes!
I made it to Penrith on the sardine special - aka Virgin Trains - too many people for not enough train. I shared a cab from the station with three other lovely novellists including fabulous new Little Black Dress author and recent winner of the Joan Hessayon prize, Allie Spencer.
The campus at newton Rigg is in a gorgeous spot and the staff there are lovely. The food however and my room were another story but at any conference it's the company that counts and I had the best company.
I was chuffed to be sharing a block with Nina Harrington, new M&B romance author and my good friends, Anna Louise Lucia and Biddy Coady. I soon met up with other online friends,and we went to the panel meeting on How much is too much? with Melanie Hilton, Liz Gill, Helen Scott Taylor, Sue Moorcroft and Veronica Henry.
Ten to six found me, Biddy and Anna joining the queue outside the bar where I met the lovely Sue Rix and her hubby Graham.
Dinner was less than stellar as they ran out of food by the time we got inside so I ended up with a Cumberland sausage four tiny potatoes and some orange stuff that may once have been carrots but by then you could have used them as rubber bullets. Fortunately Sandra Forder had a stash of biscuits in her room.
Saturdays workshops were fab - really, seriously good. I went to Myra Kersner's Non fiction proposals - excellent workshop on selling, publishing, writing and promoting non fiction. This was followed by Hugo Summerson's brilliant talk on How to do public speaking really well. I really needed this one!
Then we had a plenary session with one of my favourite writers - Veronica Henry.She told us all about her scriptwriting for the Archers, Family Affairs, Crossroads, Holby, Heartbeat etc and how this has informed her novel writing. Fascinating stuff.
I'll tell you more in part 2!

Squee!

I'm home and Crystal Clear is listed on Amazon!
PREORDER HERE!
April 1st 2010 lol

I'm off

to the conference. I really can't wait. Lots of people I'm longing to see. Lots of people to congratulate on all kinds of things. Gossip to catch up on, wine to be drunk, workshops to be attended.
Have fun while I'm gone and as they say, if you can't be good, be careful.

RNA conference

I'm off on the train again tomorrow to the RNA conference at Penrith. I still have no case - wondering now if I'd be better with my back pack. My nails aren't done, I can't find my conference schedule that I know I put in a safe place ready, my phone is on charge and I already read the magazine I bought to take with me to read on the journey.
Oh hum, good job the train isn't till mid day tomorrow. You never know I might be almost organised by then.

Addiction

My name is Nell and I am a Blueberry addict. I love this time of year when those tempting little boxes of fruity juiciness appear in the supermarkets. I really don't eat much chocolate at all - maybe the odd Bounty bar if I'm feeling stressed but Blueberries - yum.
One more day to go and I can focus on the RNA conference at Penrith. I need Mr Nell to rescue my case with the wonky wheel from the loft and I need to ensure that I'm packing extra caffeine in my handbag and I'll be good to go. I travel pretty light as I don't possess a huge choice of clothes and I only possess four pairs of shoes altogether and one of those pairs are my green work wellies. So I'll be the scruffy woman with the dodgy suitcase and the coffee in her bag eating blueberries at the railway station. I am harmless and if you come and talk to me I might even offer you a blueberry.